Preface

With the Marrakech, Paris and Vancouver legs of our Five Continents challenge behind us, we packed our overworked suitcases for one last time in 2009 and set off, first for Beijing and then on to Auckland to complete the final two jigsaw pieces of our Half Marathon bonanza.

No injuries this time for Anita, but she had worryingly been forced to pull out of the Chippenham Half Marathon a few weeks earlier at the ten mile mark, feeling faint. She was aiming for a sub-two hour time, but didn't make this despite the assistance of a St John's Ambulance from the ten mile mark back to the finish line! (But the incident doesn?t prevent her proudly wearing her Chippenham Half Marathon t-shirt!).

Anyway, the events at Chippenham had made up my mind to run the remaining halves with Anita - no, I'm not going soft in my old age - I just wanted to ensure she didn't pull the same trick again!

We arrived in Beijing after a ten hour flight, checked in to our hotel at 8am and set off immediately to collect our race packs. After all, Beijing couldn't be that difficult to navigate around for seasoned Globetrotters such as ourselves, could it? Mmmm.

We arrived at the Olympic Park in good time and were convinced that the Expo site must be close. Simple, we'll ask someone. English being the most popular language in the world, surely someone would speak at least the pigeon dialect. Mmmm again.

Despite Beijing being one of the most populated cities in the world, it appears that absolutely no-one speaks just a single word of English, and this made our task just a tad difficult. We walked to the East Side of the massive Bird's Nest Stadium and were instructed by someone who neither knew what we were talking about nor cared, back round to the West Side. Twenty minutes later, we were directed back round to the East Side by someone equally knowledgeable and caring. And so this went on for the next two hours.

Eventually we decided we were in the wrong place, and stumbled on the race collection point by sheer fluke. After long last we were going to get our race numbers. Mmmm a third time.

It appears that we needed to bring along a photocopy of our passports, but didn't realise this from the atrocious English on the instructions. No problem, though, because they had a photocopier. What a shame it was then, that the previous copy done a second or two earlier had caused it to break.

Apparently, no photocopy - no race numbers. After another seemingly endless wait the two 'technicians' managed to repair it (they kept turning it off and on, basically) and we left, race numbers in hand to get some well earned refreshments.

Race Day

Having mastered the art of reading pigeon English, I had noticed in the pre-race instructions that the finish was about seven or eight miles as the crow flies from the start in Tiananmen Square. However, this wouldn't be a problem as there would be vans transporting bags from the start to the finish. Mmmm - number four, I think?

So, off we set at 7am in the morning (after no sleep whatsoever, mainly due to getting a massive 16 hours the night before!) for the short walk to the start. Tiananmen Square is the largest public square on Earth, yet it was still filled to capacity with almost every resident of Beijing who had decided to run one of the four distances on offer (and all starting at the same time - clever eh?!).

It wasn't a cold morning, and we therefore decided to dump our bag on the van early to avoid the queues. Unfortunately, a few thousand other runners had the same idea - but about an hour earlier. As a consequence all the vans were full and had already departed. I didn't really understand the Chinese language when I arrived in Beijing, but I think I understand one or two of the less savoury words now, after spending a few minutes listening to Beijingers hurl them at the one remaining van driver (poor sod!).

Most were throwing their bags at the chap and expecting them to be at the finish line, but not quite having as much faith as they did, I decided that I would run with the bag on my back. With only a few minutes now to go to the race, that must surely be the last problem. Mmmm number five.

To get back to Anita I had to climb over a three foot railing, which I made a pretty good job of the first 90% of. It was the last 10% that proved I was no hurdler, and just about every one of the assembled thousands heard the massive 'rrrripppp' that was my shorts. With a minute or two to go to the start, it was with an immense sense of nervousness that I dared to look down.

Thankfully only half of the length of the shorts had torn. If the tear had been an inch or two longer the shorts would have been un-wearable and the Chinese spectators along the route would have got much more than they had bargained for - believe me, I had come too far on this journey to let a silly thing like no shorts stop me from completing Half Marathon number 4.

As it was, the shorts were hanging by a thread and it was all I could do to stop Anita from dying with laughter as we stood amongst the tens of thousands in Tiananmen Square waiting for the starting signal.

In no time whatsoever, they were off - the lead runners that is, not my shorts, which were hanging on and showing just a bit more of my leg than is considered decent in these parts of the world.

The massive field (including a 4k, 9k, Half Marathon and Marathon, all running together) meant that chaos reigned for the first few miles - well, until after the 9k mark really. There was much treading on heels and as a result of this I think a few Beijingers understand just a few choice words of Bristolian (delivered by Anita that is, not me!).

The course was perfectly flat, with not even the slightest rise or fall. This meant that despite our relatively (even in Anita's terms!) slow start, we managed to claw back time in the latter few miles and we eventually managed to finish in a respectable 2 hours, 4 minutes and 52 seconds. Which was a good job really, as we later found out whilst sitting in a McDonalds' close to the finish line.

I had read in the pre-race notes that there was a cut-off time of 2.5 hours, but didn't realise just how literally this would be taken! At exactly 10.45am (the 2.5 hour mark), roads that were closed became immediately open. All officials walked off the course, leaving those slower runners who wished to finish, to negotiate alone roads as busy as any motorway back in Britain.

Whilst I felt sorry for them, I must admit that it was a far better spectator draw than any conventional Half Marathon. I'm sure I could see from my vantage point the Beijing equivalent of William Hill taking bets on which runners would survive and which wouldn't. If Anita hadn't already finished I might even have put a tenner on myself (she's generally so slow in the last mile that she'd be hit by an unreliable car being bump-started by its owner).

In the cold light of day we concluded that the chaotic organisation and the problems which had confronted us prior to race day had combined to make finishing the race an even bigger achievement than it would normally be.

Postscript

It's not the best organised race in the world. I suspect it's not the best organised race in Beijing! But the Beijing Half is certainly an experience that will live with us for many years to come. It was without doubt the most difficult challenge to date - just managing to complete all of the immigration forms and get to the start line - let alone the finish - in a country where few people speak any English whatsoever is an achievement in itself.

Having decided to take a break from competitive running for a few months (at least) I was able to take in an awful lot more than I would normally do. Anita, on the other hand, had managed to put the disappointment of Chippenham behind her and finish close enough to her long term target of breaking 2 hours to act as an incentive to keep trying in 2010.

"But what about Auckland in a couple of week's time?" I hear you saying. Well, we have something planned for our last race of five that I suspect will preclude a fast time!

Oh - and if you were wondering - yes, my shorts did last the distance and will be receiving needle and thread treatment before Auckland in the interest off decency!

We're now over 90% of the way to achieving our fund-raising target of £3,000 for St Peter's Hospice in Bristol. Anyone interested in helping us raise money for St Peter's Hospice can do so by visiting www.justgiving.com/5continents

Phil Westlake